Deep thoughts

Hi Guys

I had a lovely night last night, Pop and Bear stayed for dinner and the after Pop left I went to art class while bear baby sat the girls.

I have often raved about art, but frankly I just want to be able to do more and better. Last night I tried some charcoal drawings which is way different to what I am used to, but hey now I have discovered another aspect I want to work. So much to learn and so little time, I need several lifetimes to do all the things I want to do. Maybe I have had them and I am just a slow learner, which would be a real bummer.

Bear stayed overnight, first time and it was strange hearing the deep snoring coming from my lounge couch and oh I had forgotten the other issue with having a man in the house overnight, the toilet seat.

It was nice to wake up and find bear and the girls wrapped in blankets in front of the TV, sort of reminds me of what I miss in not having a partner.

We had a lovely breakfast and Bear has just taken the girls to school while I tidy up and do my morning scribblings.

Last night my girl friends asked me about the relationship with Bear, so I will let them know here and now.

Bear is my friend, not a lover or Partner; he has been an immense support to me and best of all the best confident a person can have. He is patient, I have never once heard a angry word (unless he is talking to insurance type people) and the girls love him and whats more I trust him with them.

Bear is almost 20 years older than me, but age isnt the issue, it is timing. Both Bear and I have come out of relationships that ended abruptly or in my case with really nasty implications. It has taken me a while to trust having a man around and I have to thank Pop for introducing me to Bear who has taken to being my emotional support with all the love and tenderness only an elder man can show.

Last night we discussed relationships and I have learnt a lot about him and his last one, obviously he still carries a lot of love for his last partner and the two children they have. I asked why he doesn’t talk about them and there is the issue I think, so time will tell.

I hope he eventually rekindles the love he had for them, but if that is not to be then I am sure my Bear will endure.

He is a very deep man, hugely complex to understand. He is practical but deeply spiritual. Kind of sounds like the ultimate partner, and apart from our own issues he may have been. Regardless of what lies in our future Bear will always be the girls and my best friend.

Talia told me this morning when we were secretly talking about Bear,

“We already have a grand poppy mummy, why cant Bear be our new daddy”.

The innocence of children, and I can see a lot more talking required.

If you are reading this Bear

We all love you.